The #1 Question I'm Asked the Most

anonymous woman covering face with paper

Have you guessed what it is yet?

You got it…

“How do you do it all?”

Wanna know my simple candid answer? I don’t. That’s right…I simply can’t do it all and God doesn’t expect and want me to.

We put these unattainable expectations on ourselves and then wonder why we’re worn out, overwhelmed, and weary as a wife and mom.

Sometimes we even look over the fence and secretly desire to be like our friends who appear to have it all together.

What they may not be letting you in on is a little secret that most moms don’t realize…

Every time you say ‘yes’ to something or someone you have to say ‘no’ to something else.

So, how do you know what to say "yes” to and “no” to as a busy mom who wants to please God, her husband, children, church, and everybody else, right? I get it. I asked that same question for years.

Then one day it hit me, because it’s been right there the whole time. If you know me even a little bit you know exactly where I’m going with this. I can’t do anything apart from Christ. I don’t have any wisdom outside of God’s Word. Yep, we’re heading over to the Bible.

That’s where the answer is…let’s go on a little journey together. Shall we?

There are three passages I want us to explore together. Don’t worry this isn’t a Bible study or anything, just a little short adventure I want you to join me on for a few minutes.

  1. Know your days are numbered. “Teach us to number our days
    that we may get a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12).
    Time is the rarest commodity on earth, yet we treat it as if it’s the most common or available. It’s important that you treat time for the special gift that it is and learn ways to redeem it.

    In Ephesians 5:15-16, you are reminded to, “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.”

    When trying to decide what you should and shouldn’t do or take on, remember to ask yourself how will this ________ take me away or toward what’s truly important. Glorifying God, respecting your husband, loving your children, and managing your home well are the things that you’ve been called to do. Once those things are done well you can look at your availability to see if any time remains for the other things you desire to do.

  2. Make the Lord your delight. “Trust in the Lord, and do good;
    Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:3-4).

    This is one of my favorite verses ever, because it’s a call for us to really know and trust God. How do we do that? By feeding on His faithfulness. Once we find our delight in Him and His plan for our day He will give you the desires of your heart. I’ve seen and experienced it time and time again.

    You must start your day with God and let Him in on your plans so He can order your day aright. Whether it’s meditating on a favorite verse, sitting down to a devotion, or doing an all out Bible study each morning. Your day must start with God and be aligned with His plan, not yours. Always leave room for the Holy Spirit to have His way with your day.

  3. Follow God’s blueprint for success not the world’s. “Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ” (Colossians 2:8). The world tells us to be superwoman and we can have and do it all. Christ says, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:29). Newsflash…I’m not superwoman and neither are you. Look at us, we’re just two mamas trying to glorying God in our marriage and home. Guess what mama, that’s sufficient.

    You were created to rest in Christ. You can serve Him in your marriage and motherhood from a place of rest not a place of busyness. You must keep your mission before you at all times and not let the habit of being busy take you away from what God is calling you to do. There are no special badges or crowns in heaven for “The World’s Busiest Mom”.

    “What is God’s blueprint anyway versus the world”, you may be asking. I can just hear you now 😉 Don’t worry, mama, I got ya covered.

The World’s Blueprint

  • Love yourself, you are amazing. Believe in you

  • Don’t let a man rule over you. You are better than your husband

  • Put your children in daycare and don’t let them keep you from achieving your dreams

  • You can do it all and have it all

God’s Blueprint

  • Love God with all your heart (Mark 12:30a)

  • Love, respect and submit to your husband (Ephesians 5:22, 33b)

  • Love and disciple your children (Titus 2:4, Deuteronomy 6:7-9, 1 Timothy 2:15)

  • Manage your home well (Titus 2:5)

I hope you can clearly see the stark contrast from God and the world.

Well, let’s wrap this all up with a nice pretty little bow.

The bottom line is this…you need to focus on God’s agenda and not the world’s. That is how you will be able to do it all.

“Doing it all” isn’t the world’s way of busyness, grind, and hustle. Doing it all focuses on what God has called you to do and not the world or even well-meaning friends. You have to be so clear on what God calls you to as a wife and mom that you can easily decipher when something will fall outside of that sphere.

When it’s identified, you can be clear and confident on what you can say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to. Only you know if you should really be taking on that part-time job, temporary teaching position, Bible study, dinner party, piano lessons, and the list goes on and on and on, right? I think you get the point.

Trust me, I get the whole pride thing. It can be flattering to be asked to do something on behalf of another or to serve. But make sure you are serving the very people you’ve been called to take care of first. “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much” (Luke 16:10).

Just because you can doesn’t mean you should.

Remember mama, you don’t have to please everyone, you just have to please the Holy One 💗

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